DNA Match to Me But Don't Know How?

I Probably Do.

If you share 20 cm or more with me, I probably know how we're related, in terms of which 3rd great grandparent(s) we share, even if you don't have that ancestor in your tree.

During the big COVID lockdown of 2020, I spent weeks and weeks meticulously color-coded my DNA matches based on which great grandparent the DNA match was related to. Every person has eight great grandparents. I started with color coding matches I knew, for sure, how they were related to me. After several weeks of this, I could figure out how people that I shared a lot of DNA with, but whom I did not know, were related to me, at least in terms of which of my great grandparents' family lines we shared. And then Ancestry launched its "pro" service, which helped me identify DNA matches even further (but remember: always confirm info from DNA trees with Census data, marriage indices, birth certificates, etc. - SO many people's family trees are wrong).

I was hoping doing this would help me to be able to identify more people in my family tree, further back into my tree - and, indeed, it did!

When I did it back in 2020, you didn't have to pay extra to see how your DNA matches were related to each other, but now you do, but I high recommend doing it - doing it for even just one month will reveal SO MUCH. Start with people that you share over 100 cm with. Once you get them done - and be sure to double and triple check your work, make sure it's accurate - then move to everyone 50 cm and above. And once you have those done, them move to everyone 30 and above. And some people are going to get more than one color because they are going to be related to you via more than one line.

As you go along, fill out more of your family tree, correct mistakes, etc.

This is what I did, starting during COVID and then on and off, for a month or two, every year since, even down to people with 20 cm or more with me.

What all this means is that, if you share 20 cm or more with me, I probably know how we're related, in terms of which 3rd great grandparent(s) we share, even if you don't have that ancestor in your tree.

HOWEVER... there is another issue: some of those matches, when YOU don't know how we're related, are the result of liaisons outside of marriage in the 1800s or 1900s. In such cases, almost always, I have found the city or county where that person's ancestor and my ancestor lived in at the same time, confirming what the DNA is hinting at. 

I'm not going to contact you when I realize we share an ancestor that you don't have in your tree except under very particular circumstances - like when you make it clear in your bio that that's what you are looking for.

But if you see that we're related via a DNA match of 20 and above and you really don't know how, but you want to know, write me - I will be happy to answer your questions. Just be ready for ancestral surprises. 

Also see:

Family names & my family research priorities.

The tragic death of William L. "Billy" Smith, brother of my great-great grandmother and surrogate father to my great-grandfather, W.A. Beasley.

Trying to find out more about my Beasley family tree (beyond my third great grandparents, in Tennessee, Georgia and South Carolina).

Seeking help to access historical records in Perry County, Alabama, Hale County, Alabama, Polk County, Tennessee and somewhere in Georgia.

Emma Smith: my 2rd great-grandmother, buried in Reed, Kentucky, father was German, mother's origins unknown. 

The Enslavers in My Family. Identifying my ancestors in Kentucky who held enslaved people and trying to identify those enslaved people by name.

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